Brooding blogger

***

“I refuse to give up the faux-fur until at least March!”

***

WAVING HELLO TO 2014

***

I’ve been brooding on this post for quite some time now (looooong before New Years Eve even reared its ugly head) and even as I sit here, having given it a relatively significant amount of thought, I’m still not entirely sure what I should be writing. You see, I’m not really the resolutions kind of person (it’s just never been my thing) and, in fact, I can pretty much count on my right hand how many times I’ve ‘celebrated’ the New Year in the typical champagne quaffing/dancing till the wee hours fashion, having always preferred a more low key event to wave in another twelve months of who-knows-what; and none of it came with a do-to list either. With that said, I feel it would be rude not to put my thoughts on paper, as it were, regarding what 2013 has meant to me and how I hope 2014 will unfold. After reading several terrific posts on the matter (Bonzai Aphrodite, Joy The Baker and Oh Dear Drea said it the best in my opinion), I’ve at least got a starting point. I think. Bear with me, this might not be pretty.

***

***

“Cupboards full of crockery makes me happy”

***

SAYING NO TO RESOLUTIONS

***

Cutting to the chase, I will be making (count them) zero resolutions, which may just render this post null and void already but stay with me just a second longer to let me explain further. Of course, I’m not saying making plans is a bad thing – I make plans all the time (ALL THE TIME) and I have the countless notebooks full of lists to prove it. However, I understand ‘resolutions’ (and correct me if I’m wrong) to mean something more than simply planning for ones future whilst remaining firmly in the present… as I see it, they certainly have the air of feeling more binding - and in some ways negate the way you have thus far chosen to live your life. Whilst there’s nothing wrong with learning a new skill etc. the pressure that comes with ‘New Year Resolutions’ automatically makes me feel like a total failure – perhaps that’s a silly reaction to such a positive initiative but I can only be honest about my attitude towards such things, and it’s quite clear to me as I iterate it now that my attitude clearly stinks. And, for me, that’s fine.

***

Please don’t mistake my intentions here because it is not to rain on anybody’s parade. I actually admire those who embrace the New Year with this gung-ho, feel-good, head-on action but I know myself well enough to realise it’s just not for me. All of this doesn’t omit me from the reflective mood everyone seems to be in though, and indeed it’s made me realise how little need I have for so-called resolutions in my life right now. After a reasonably eventful year (moving to Cornwall, getting a book deal were just two highlights) and becoming ever more comfortable in my own skin (currently loving my thirties), I’m confident the only thing I require in my world is what I already happen to have… my Husband, family, health and happiness.

***

***

“Christmas drinks are still on the menu in our house”

***

LIVING IN THE PRESENT

***

I’m excited for the future but am so firmly in the present right now, it’s difficult for me to think more than a few days ahead, which is why I’ve put a line through the resolution thing and I can safely say I’m all the better for it. This self-called ‘stinky’ attitude has even extended to my eating habits (no cleansing diets for me – hurrah!) and work ethic (I never miss my deadlines, so why the unnecessary stress?), which means I’m not even fully acknowledging the Christmas period has officially ended. Delusional, moi? Sure, I’d like to bring my violin skills back up to scratch but what matters more to me is simply enjoying playing again, as well as regaining my love for an instrument that permeated my life for so many years. And yes, I desperately want to write more, and am hoping my creativity will manifest itself in a film script I’ve put on the back burner for way too long now, but (but, but, but!) I’m more interested in finding a great writing partner that I can collaborate with because I miss bouncing ideas off another brain. Okay, so I’ll semi-concede that these ‘loose plans’ are maybe, possibly (in that they totally are) actually resolutions masking themselves as a no pressure mini to-do list but the great thing about ‘loose plans’ (which these emphatically are) is that you have nothing to lose… and right now that is music to my resolution-phobe ears.

***

***

“Refamiliarising myself with a very old friend”

***

At present, I feel totally comfortable in letting 2014 organically unfold. Quite honestly, I am just eternally grateful for everything I do have and whilst I’m anxious (in a good way) for what the new year will bring, my happy-self remains firmly in the moment… which, when all is said and done, is all we’ve really got. I’ve never been sure about the reckless nature the ‘live every moment as if it were your last’ sentiment promotes but I can totally get down with Whitman when he said:

***

Happiness, not in another place but this place… not for another hour but this hour

***

Right on Walt. Right on.

***

***

“Getting back to basics with some old school writing tools”

***

 

 

 

One Response to “Brooding blogger”

  1. [...] I’m sure there’s a handful of us who don’t, but I enjoyed Aine’s Brooding Blogger not only because she’s a peach, but I can relate to this post 100%.  I could compose my own [...]

Leave a Reply